Are Taylor and Travis Relationship Goals?

Between having a stepdaughter in her mid-20s who is a Swiftie and being a regular fan of NFL games, I’ve had a decent introduction to Taylor Swift and Travis Kelce’s relationship – at least the public-facing part of it. I’ve seen the breathless social media posts exclaiming #RelationshipGoals when some new tidbit comes out about the couple, laughed at the memes, and, yes, even caught bits and pieces of what happened on The Eras Tour. And, yesterday, after much speculation, it was *finally* announced – your English teacher and gym teacher are getting married.

Some of the allure of the relationship is undoubtedly related to the fame of both people. Taylor Swift is a billion-dollar entertainment juggernaut who has legions of faithful fans (and is also known for the famous men she has dated over the years). Travis Kelce is a 3-time Super Bowl-winning and 10-time Pro Bowl tight end who plays for one of the more dominant football teams of the last decade. Their relationship is as classic as the high school football star dating the head cheerleader.

But it’s not just the fame and storybook-quality of the relationship that seem to draw people to their tale. From what we can see on the outside (which, let’s be honest, is likely curated by teams of PR agents), Taylor and Travis have a seemingly healthy relationship with each other, and the following characteristics suggest maybe, just maybe, they may have gotten the playbook down finally:

They have similar values

In an interview with GQ Magazine, Travis said, “We are two fun-loving people who have the morals to appreciate everyone for who they are. We share all those values…nowadays, I just want to be respected and loved by the people that I’m surrounded by in my work. I want to leave it better than where it was when I started. And I see her having those same values.”

While opposites may attract, experts agree that having shared values and beliefs are important for the long-term stability and health of a romantic relationship. Values such as the importance of (or unimportance of) family, religion/spirituality, work ethic, and those related to financial goals are amongst those that tend to be key in most relationships.

But couples don’t need to share everything…

They have separate interests

Travis is into video games, plays golf, and has a podcast with his brother, Jason Kelce. Taylor enjoys baking sourdough bread, sewing, and painting. Both individuals can be seen out and about with friends without their famous partner also in attendance.

Healthy couples have separate interests and hobbies, as well as friendships with others. It is important for the two people in a couple to maintain their individual personalities and not become enmeshed or co-dependent upon each other. Time apart from each other and involvement in personal interests allows each person to grow and develop, promoting better understanding of one’s self, which can lead to better understanding of their partner.

Time apart is important, but so is time together.

They make time to connect with each other

As the pop magazines can attest to, Travis and Taylor, regardless of how busy they were, made time to see each other, or, at the very least, call each other regularly. Pictures and articles about the various events they attended together and vacations they went on together could be found regularly in the media.

Most of us don’t have the bank account necessary for springing for a last-minute trip to Montana or a luxury vacation in Lake Como, Italy. But connection and quality time together are less about the fancy trappings and more about the intention – spending time together with few to no distractions, actively listening to each other, and expressing your connection and affection for your partner. This could as simple as having a “no phones” dinner together or going out for a walk together.

Making time for each other – touching base with each other, re-engaging and re-connecting, and continuing to learn about each other – is one of the keys to a healthy relationship. This connection then allows you to figure out what your partner needs from you.

They support each other

Yes, as any football fan is aware of, Taylor regularly showed up in the stands to cheer on Travis. And, as the tabloids were eager to share, Travis regularly jetted to various stops on The Eras Tour to be Taylor’s biggest fan and encouraged her when she was trying to get back ownership of the master recordings of her early songs. Showing up for each other – in ways big and small – is an important part of feeling cared for and supported in a relationship.

Supporting your partner isn’t just about being there physically to cheer them on (when appropriate) – it’s about being an active listener when they are stressed and helping them to regroup when life gets them down or gets tough.

So are Travis and Taylor a bona fide “Love Story?” Who knows? But at least some of the behaviors that they display with each other are definitely relationship goals.

Interested in improving your relationship by working with a couples counselor? Reach out to us today!

Big thank you to Barrie Tabor for allowing use of her personal photograph of Taylor